Good Morning My Loves,
A few weeks ago while on instagram I posted a live video discussing how imperative it is for you to be respected in all that you do. Especially as a woman pursuing her dreams and goals in a male dominated world. So As promised, here I am to discuss, encourage, and motivate you as a female to always stand your ground no matter what. Often times, I have been disregarded due to my appearance or expected to reduce my intelligence in the presence of men or told that “I’m here to be quiet and look sexy”. Taking it a step further, I have been treated as an accessory in many situations and have been not only threatened, but called “whores”, “bitches”, “slut”, and you name any other derogatory name you can think of, because of my outward appearance. I’ve been made to feel that my contributions if not sexual or menial in nature didn’t matter working in predominately male environments. Furthermore, I have had men attempt to treat me as property in business and verbally harassor becoming aggressive for pursuing opportunities outside of their wants or desires.
However, none of the above is ever acceptable. I don’t care how sexy you choose to look or how modest, you as a woman deserve to be respected in all that you do. Many may try to argue that your appearance dictates how you should be treated, but I stand on the fact that ALL people should deal with each other respectfully. NO matter if you decide to bear more skin or cover completely up, as a woman you deserve respect. You are not to be objectified. You are not to be told that your value is meaningless unless you’re assuming the position of being seen and not heard. Furthermore, you should not be threatened for not complying to unwarranted behaviors and or attention. You deserve respect and consideration in all your relationships, whether it be personal or business. There should never be an opportunity where any man or woman feels comfortable to cross boundaries of human decency and overall compassion. As a woman working in any level of relationship, you are not property of anyone, you are your own individual being with rights and freedom.
Respect is never to be negotiated. It is never an option that should be removed from any situation. It is never an existence that anyone should settle for. It doesn’t matter how wonderful an opportunity is, when your respect is being wagered, walking away is necessary. As mentioned in my blog post from January, “Never Go On Clearance“, always operate from your place of worth and value. The moment you discount yourself, is the very moment that you open the doors to be mishandled, manipulated, abused, and disregarded. You’re better than that. Additionally, men, it is your responsibility to honor, respect, and protect all women. You should never feel comfortable mistreating a female simply because you view her as the “lesser species”. It is never okay to express such crudeness and treat a woman as if you view her as less than human or merely for sexual pleasure. If you witness such behavior from a male, it is also your responsibility to stand up and present a stance of zero tolerance. We owe it to one another to stand for what’s right and honor each other with respect. We also shouldn’t stand for anyone being publicly or privately mistreated. No one should be threatened to silence or made to feel powerless. YOU always have the power to stand up for yourself, no matter the outcome. In my life, I’ve had to walk away from many opportunities, friendships, family members due to lack of respect or consideration. It may hurt to cut off certain relationships or lose opportunities, but just imagine staying and enduring being treated inhumane, in the end it is never worth it. It is never worth it to compromise your personal peace of mind. It is not okay for any man to feel that it is a normality to treat women as sex objects or beneath. It’s never okay to be threatened, stalked, verbally assaulted or handled aggressively. In the end, it is NEVER okay to NEGOTIATE RESPECT.
With Love,
Lorna
In the words of the great Lauryn Hill, “respect is a minimum.” If you treat me badly because of YOUR peeception of me, what does it say about YOU? Great read.